The Excited Southerner Proposes To A Girl
Girl: «You wanted to ask me something?»
Excited Southerner: «Yes, I did. I –
first of all I just wanted to say that you’re –
– very pretty girl, and I, I —
hoo — you’the — we’ve known each other for so long now,
and-uh, it’s about time that the two of us —
we’re both getting older right now, and-uh,
and I don’t want to die alone, I — tell you that much —
hoo — getting ahead of myself — got ta slow down, hoo-hoo,
concentrate on what I’m trying to get across to you right now,hoo,
I mean, whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-willing
to be a house husband, you don’t have to qu-qu-qu-qu-quit your
job there, there, I’m, I’m, the-, I’m, I’m —
hoo, honeymoon in the Poconos, with the — hoo, woo hoo
— sex optional — you don’t have to do what you don’t want todo,
hoo hoo hoo hoo, someday you’re going to love me, and that —
that’s fi– til death do us part I, we’ll get the chocolatecake
and the sunrise and the sunset — no prenuptial agree –«
Girl: «Look, are you trying to ask me to marry you?
Because I’m just not ready for that kind of commitment.»
Excited Southerner: «Coooooo.»